I take my headphones off. “Are you David?” asks the flight attendant. I nod with apprehension, is this a “doctor on board” scenario? Did someone lose their bitcoins? No of course not. “I just wanted to welcome you to Delta SkyMiles!” Ah of course, yes, I did sign up. An hour passes, I’ve finished another chapter of the book. A second flight attendant is getting my attention. “Are you David? Congrats on joining SkyMiles and welcome to the Delta family!” I smile and nod again, it’s a bit much but still quite welcoming. Another hour. The passenger in the middle seat leans over. I pull off my headphones again. “David, I’d like to be the first to welcome you to Delta SkyMiles!” I nod again, this time with apprehension. Strange joke. They must have heard the flight attendants. It wasn’t until the third flight attendant walked up that I started to get concerned. Where did they come from? There were only two on my flight. Same greeting, same response. My flight landed, and I quickly headed off the plane, only to hear a “David?” from behind – the pilot yelling after me. I quicken my pace. I hail a lyft from the app. I look behind me, and see the pilot racing through the crowds trying to deliver his greeting. My lyft pulls up, I get in hastily. “Ride for David?” confirms the driver as I climb in. “Yes!” I say, catching my breath as we speed away. The driver, picking up speed as he enters the freeway, turns his head around to stare directly at me. My vision starts to fog. “Welcome to Delta SkyMiles! We’re so glad to have you on board!” Everything fades to black.