I can confirm that the guy is telling the truth.. Because I was there. And that was the day I died.

You always have these fantasies of what you’d do and how you’d save the day in a school shooting… But it’s not like that. The bullets crack and explode around you and suddenly none of that pretend matters. It’s like, you’re suddenly in this hurricane of movement, this swirling maelstrom of purple dread and there’s no way out. This is real and this is now. Fight or flight kicks in. Screaming. Rush for cover.

I ducked into a nearby door and found four other students cowering on the floor. We built a brick wall with a window in it (nobody had much metal) and then we waited for the shooter to get close. Everybody had only blue weapons except me so I was elected squad pointman.

When I first saw the shooter, the first thing you notice is the custom pickaxe. Then you see the galaxy skin. And then, you notice the total lack of empathy the guy just exudes. When he charged, he spammed out a laughing emote with psychopathic glee. My first friend got shot right then, his backpack exploding and scattering his items everywhere across the floor. Then the second, then the third, fireworks of ammunition, medicine, and provisions.

The shooter slowly stepped up to me, savoring the kill. He chucked a dance grenade at my feet, and suddenly we were boogeying in the bullet-riddled hallway of my school. You ever dance with the devil in the cold moonlight? Well, I have, staring into his eyes while it happened. I saw his intent, and we both knew the fatal game of freeze dance that would take place when the music stopped. I clapped and spun and cried for the chicken dinner this man would soon possess.

The music ended. I whipped for my pistol, but he was faster. Four bullet holes in my chest. I toppled to the floor. But as I fell, my revolver shot rang true: the shooter’s head exploded, scattering purple and gold items all across the floor.

I needed a revive, but my squad mates were dead. As I lay dying, I knew at least my theories of relativity would carry on after me as my legacy. The school shooting was over, and there wouldn’t be another in America for at least a fortnight.