When John the Baptist, who literally had no drip baptized, Jesus, he said it’s giving Savior of the world. John’s disciples were like say less and followed Jesus.

So now Jesus goes around passing the vibe check everywhere. The religious leaders said, this was major sus.

But tons of people said his teaching high key slapped. And that his authority hit different. He spoke in cursive so that IYKYK.

Mary Magdalene, who was a total snack, had seven demons in her. Jesus told them to take several seats so they ghosted her and she left her simps to follow Jesus.

Common Jesus W.

Now the woke leaders said this was giving main character energy. Too much actually so they decided to cancel him.

They kept sending soldiers to throw hands, but Jesus always ghosted them. When he decided it was time, he finally caught those hands.

They put him under trial asking if he was CEO of the world he said, bet. But they didn’t understand the assignment and said cap.

When he was crucified, only a few people stanned. He said seven things that live rent free in their heads, and he died and was buried.

But three days later, he ghosted the tomb and had glow up. And Mary Magdalene said I’m weak and Peter said I’m dead. And all the disciples said it was sending them.