I woke up this morning, fully erect(keep that in mind, it becomes important later), and I put one foot on the floor, but when I tried to put my other one down, I felt a sharp pain in my foot, and I leaped because of the jarring pain, smacking my forehead into my monitor, cracking the screen. Of course, I’m rightfully pissed off about this, and start breathing heavily, angered at what has happened to my monitor. I look at what caused that pain in my foot, and it was a lego, sitting on the ground. I started running out of my room towards my little brother’s room because he was playing with legos yesterday and is the most likely culprit for the devilish trap sitting next to my bed.

Unluckily for me, I tripped over my wholesome, lazy-ass cat(for some pics, go to my post history and look for my latest post in r/Chonkers). Me, being the sick parkour gamer I am, did a safety roll, but I hit my head into the wall. Because of this and my room being on the second floor, the area where I tripped is right by the stairs, I began to plummet down the stairs. My still erect penis hits the stairs at the bottom, and I immediately begin crying as my cock burns in immense pain.

I look down at my meat scepter, unfortunately finding it bleeding and bending upwards starting in the middle, like a right angle. I cried, holding my snapped dick in my hand. At this point, I was so preoccupied on mourning the loss of my shmeat wand that I didn’t even notice my mom walking down the stairs to investigate the loud noises and almost demonic sounds coming from my mouth as I was moaning, crying and groaning in both pleasure and pain.

Think of it this way, you’re my mother, you hear a bunch of loud noises and walk downstairs to find your son, completely nude, sitting on the floor, crying, holding his penis that is broken beyond repair. Yeah, pretty fucking weird.

My birth-giver touches her hand on my shoulder and I turn to her with fear, pain, disgust, and really just a rainbow of emotions on my face all at once. I start screaming as I hold my now useless semen sprayer.

Flash forward a week and I’m more miserable than ever, I haven’t masturbated in a week, pissing is literal hell, my super-soaker is snapped, my monitor is broken and worst of all, my wholesome 100 chonker is starting to lose weight because i haven’t been able to get out of bed to give him 17 extra bowls of food due to the pain my one way ticket to pound town is in.

TL;DR I stepped on a lego and through a series of very hellish events, I ended up breaking my monitor and snapping my penis into a permanent right angle.