It’s not that I’m a lazy piece of shit. I’ve tried about twenty kinds of sports, including skiing, the gym, swimming, kickboxing, judo, cycling, jogging, soccer, basketball and baseball.

I just loathe the sweating, stinking, the muscle cramps the next day, the oftentimes expensive unnecessarily stuff (have you seen the price tags on those judo suits?), I hate the stares if you do something not perfectly right/if you’re obviously a beginner (ESPECIALLY in the gym), but most of all I hate all that ‘but sports is so FUN!’ bullshit. No, it’s not. It’s HORRIBLE. It makes me uncomfortable for the aforementioned reasons and it’s just a chore, an utter hardship. Even after months of forcing myself to do it, when it’s supposed to be fun, it’s still a shit show.

Good God I hate sports.