Recently, bitch mommy has developed a scat fetish, and to be quite frank, I don’t know if I’m entirely into it. mommy has irritable bowel syndrome, and has had it since she was little. She tends to defaecate whenever she gets sexually stimulated. Being the cuck that I am, I never get to witness her stinky accident poops because she kicks me out of the room when our bull, Jamalion, comes over. She makes me listen to her getting railed through the wall between our bedrooms, and between the moans, I can hear an occasional “brapppppp”.

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However, when I was cleaning her room the other day, I noticed a sock full of fecal matter. Being desperate for any form of sexual stimulation, I tasted her poop and asked her about it. After a good scolding, she told me that Jamalion sticks his “Air Jordan” tube socks up her poohole when they fuck to prevent her from defecating all over his hot, black body. She has recently made a habit of making me eat her “poop sock” (as she calls it) on a weekly basis. I enjoy the taste of her delicious ass secretions, but the consumption of socks has lead to me being sent to the emergency room on numerous occasions. The ER doctor knows me on a first name basis by now.

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I’m on welfare and worried that my frequent ER visits are a burden on the American taxpayer. What should I do?