I love gender neutral bathrooms. I have a big map of all of them in public spaces in my city. It’s like going on a TREASURE HUNT. Sometimes I will strike gold and there will be no one in there except a single mother and a young girl. I take a huge grunting shit, having deliberately given myself diarrhea. I made a little platform above the toilet water out of paper, so it has maximum exposure to the air for proper smell dispersion. I have heard crying before. For dessert, I walk out of there with an erection visible through my spandex leggings.

If you have a daughter, a sister, a wife, I WILL DO THIS TO THEM. You have zero choice of the matter.