“Are you guys ready to go yet? We have a long drive ahead of us,” Beetlejuce whined. He was going on a cross-country road trip with his three best friends– Pennywise, Squip, and Lorax. With Jojo running the whorehouse and Jeremy safely with his babysitter, (A short man who wore camouflage lingerie and had an odd fixation with twinks pissing themselves in the school bathroom while Kermit the Frog watched,) they were able to indulge in a trek across the US of A, starting their journey in Maine where they had spent the past night in the home of Georgie Denbrough– Pennywise’s on again, off again boyfriend. 

“I’m ready,” Squip said, walking into the room, a Mickey Mouse suitcase trailing behind him and a pacifier jammed in his slimy mouth. 

“Lorax, where’s your suitcase?” Beetlejuice asked curiously. The Lorax responded not with words, but with a simple action. He bent over and beared his fuzzy orange asscheeks. Squip, Pennywise, and Beetlejuice’s eyes widened as they saw all of his luggage stored between his voluptuous globes. 

“I guess we can go now!” Beetlejuice cheered as they all walked to get in the car. Pennywise was driving first, Beetlejuice sitting at his side in the passenger seat. Lorax and Squip climbed into the back like little cucks. Georgie and Bill both kissed Pennywise goodbye before heading back inside their mansion. Little did they know Mike Hanlon, Jake Dillinger, Jerome Kindergarten, and Token Black had already gone to town on it, stealing their massive dildo collection. Better luck next time.

\*\*\*\*\*

After 4 hours- or maybe 3, or 2. Actually I’m not entirely sure if they left the neighborhood yet, Lorax and Squip were conked out, leaving just Pennywise and Beetlejuice. 

“Hey, Beetlejuice? Are you doing okay? I know after the whole situation with Lydia it’s been hard for you,” Pennywise sympathized, turning onto the freeway. Beetlejuice shuddered.

“Now I have no girlfriend, and can’t look at a Handbook of the Recently Deceased ever again without thinking about how it was bulldozed into my asshole!” Beetlejuice said with a sigh. 

“I’m sorry,” Pennywise said sadly. 

“Don’t feel bad, it wasn’t your fault,” Beetlejuice rubbed Pennywise’s meaty cligh, (clown thigh.)

“Actually it was my fault, I gave Lydia the idea.” 

“Oh.”

“But don’t be mad at me! I only did this to get closer to you. Beetlejuice, the truth is that I-” Pennywise cut off, one big clown foot slamming on the brakes. A stupid retard had tried to cut in front of him but was oh too close, which was a wonder due to the fact that no one else was even on the freeway. Beetlejuice screamed as the sharp jolt woke up Lorax and Squip. A queef came from the trunk, falling on deaf ears. Pennywise got out of the car, walking over to see the damage done to his 1990’s era lifted GMC 4 x 4 with over 100,000 in engine upgrades. Fortunately, there was just a little scratchly. A figure walked up to him. 

“Hello, my name is Michael Scott. Do you need directions?” 

“Sure, I do seem to be quite stuck right now.” Pennywise answered.

“That’s what she said!” Mikey joked. No one laughed. 

“You’ll have to sit in the back,” Pennywise said, getting back into his car seat. Beetlejuice looked at him with one question on his face, still confused about Pennywise’s cut off confession. Pennywise looked back at him with longing in his eyes but said nothing, opting for turning on the radio. A faggy song called “Eddie Baby,” by Felix Hagan played as Pennywise sped down the open road, running over Michael Scott’s car in the process. 

“Tell me what to do, Mikey,” Penny said. 

“That’s what she said!” The manager laughed. Squip rolled his eyes to the tune of the Rolie Polie Olie theme song. A fed up Lorax reached into his asshole and pulled out a lone baseball bat. He shared a nod with Squip and they immediately started raping Michael. 

“Noo! You take the next exit! I was just joking! It’s a goofy thing!” Beetlejuice turned around anD immediately went into PTSD and started stimming loudly. Pennywise ignored all of this as the next song started playing. 

“Oh I love this song!” Penny grinned as the opening chords to Gangnam Style began. 

“Wait, what do I do with the body?” Lorax asked, cradling a dead Micheal Scott in his fuzzy arms. 

“Throw him out the window!” Squip instructed. And Lorax did, but oh no! The body splatted on the windshield of a police car. 

“PENNYWISE! THE POLICE ARE AFTER US!” Squip yelled. An abundance of drool started slipping out of Penny’s mouth as he made a sharp turn, taking the exit. He was now speeding down a dirt road, presumably in the suburbs of a small town. 

“Where are we?” Beetlejuice asked. Lorax checked his phone.

“Ohio,” He responded. Squip squealed as he looked at the speedometer. 

“Penny! You’re going 100 in a 30!” He gaspled. Pennywise slammed on the brakes a second time. 

“What now?” Beetlejuice asked as his head hit the dashboard. 

“Look!” The dancing clown pointed to the ground ahead of them. “It’s a fox!” 

“No it’s not!” The Lorax said. “That’s a faggoty twink in a fox suit getting fucked by his dad!” 

“Oh,” Pennywise said, disappointed. 

“You retard!” Squip yelled, hitting Pennywise on his head, which looked like a hard boiled egg with three yummy tufts of cotton candy the color of rust on it. “The police are gonna catch up to us!” 

And in that moment, all four boys knew what it was like to be black. 

“Hello? You were speeding, and committed murder,” The police man said. 

“Well, what can we do to make it up to you Mr. Policeman?” Beetlejuice, the biggest whore of all, said. 

“Please, Mr. Policeman was my father. Call me Chase.”

“Chase?” Beetlejuice asked. 

“Yes, Chase Paw Patrol is my name.”

“Well then, Chase, do you think a good old suckle will make it up to you?” Beetlejuice asked, to the shock of Pennywise. (The only one who knew about his trauma.)

“I suppose so,” Chase agreed, much to Beetlejuice’s delight. The demon climbed out of the car and walked over to the brown dog, getting on his knees. He opened his oral cavity and took all of Chase’s leaking red “lipstick.” Pennywise grinned at how well the striped suit-clad boy took cock, and pulled out his phone to start filming. This would make great content for his Onlyfans. 

“ *Hgn\~”* The policeman moaned out, thruttling his hips. Suddenly a large rush of salty seed spilled out of Chase’s doghood and into Beetlejuice’s mouth. Lorax and Squip clapped their hands like a toddler watching his deadbeat dad beat his mom to a bloody pulp in their kitchen. 

“Beetlejuice really takes it like a champ, huh,” Pennywise said. The boy in question pulled off, wiping the semen from his mouth with a “Hurrah!” 

“Well, I best be on my way,” Chase said, hopping into his police car and speeding off without a second thought. Beetlejuice got back into the car, sharing a small smile with Pennywise.

“If we hurry we can make it to our hotel in Georgia before the sun sets!” The Lorax said happily. 

“Well, what are we waiting for?” Pennywise said, speeding off. 

\*\*\*\*\*

The group reached their hotel in no time, taking their luggage in and unpacking. As Beetlejuice unzipped his suitcase he screamed. 

“Guys! There’s someone in my suitcase! Actually… *two* someones!” He said incredulously. His friends rushed over to join him. The figures sat up, smiling eerily at the group.

“Hi, I’m Heidi Hansen. Would one of you like to adopt my son Evan?” Lorax sighed and started reaching into his asshole to retrieve his baseball bat.

“No!” Squip yelled, “You can’t rape a woman! That’s only for twinks.”

“Oh, okay,” Lorax said. 

“We’re going to the babyland hospital tomorrow. You can bring him there and see if anyone will adopt him, if you want,” Pennywise said. 

“Where did all my clothes go?!” Beetlejuice interjected. 

“Well, Evan is a growing boy, he gets hungry sometimes,” Heidi sniffed. 

“You’re sleeping in the suitcase then,” BJ huffed, climbing into the bed he was sharing with Penny. Lorax and Squip did the same, turning off the light and bidding Heidi goodnight. As Pennywise drifted into sack time, a lone tear dribbled down his cleek, (Clown cheek.) He wasn’t sure how long he could live like this anymore. 

\*\*\*\*\*

“Here we are at Babyland Hospital!” The Lorax exclaimed, the group of six walking up to the entrance. “Now, Pennywise, no funny business with the babies. We are just here to look around and see if anyone will adopt Evan. I know it’s already been a day, but *no sex.* ” 

“Ugh, fine,” Pennywise agreed, “I’ll be sticking with Beetlejuice!” The two mythical beings shared a grin, like a 50 year old man looking at his 3 year old grandson. Heidi Hansen started walking inside, prompting the rest of the misfits to walk inside. They all halted with a gasp when they entered. 

“What is going on?” Beetlejuice asked. 

“Where are all the dolls?” Lorax asked, craning the little bit of neck he had to call his own. 

“It appears that… *they turned this into a place for littles!”* Pennywise screeched. Squip cheered, dropping to a crawl and going off with Evan to find their people. When seeing this, Heidi Hansen left the building. Her work here was done. 

“Squip!” Beetlejuice called, “Where are you going?” 

“I’ve found my tribe.”

“But-but you can’t leave us! This is supposed to be our trip!” 

“Oh, right,” Squip realized, crawling back to join his friends. 

“I guess this means we have to leave,” Beetlejuice said, defeated. Pennywise put an arm around him confrotingly. The group of four headed back to their car and started their journey to the next location. 

\*\*\*\*\*

After a while of driving, Lorax pointed out his window,

“Look! We’re driving by Stone Mountain!” 

“Woah! There’s a man committing suicide!” Squip laughed. Beetlejuice squinted his eyes to examine who it was. 

“It’s Van Gogh!” The group erupted into a fit of giggles as Pennywise got back on the highway. They rode in comfortable silence for about an hour, Pennywise and Beetlejuice’s hands entwined, until Squip spoke up. 

“Uh…guys? I have to go to the bathroom.”

“You fucking retard, we’re on the freeway!” Lorax scolded. 

“Eeek\~ I’m gonna piss myself!” Squip groaned. Pennywise started to feel his clown cock firm up.

“W-well, Squip, I suppose you will need to go in the car,” Beetlejuice said, a delectable little blush a creepin up his cheeks. His womb broom was also hardening at the thought of the super computer soiling his panties. 

“Okay, i’ll let it out now,” Squip said. The two demons opened their ears and let out an in-sync moan as they heard a hiss, and then a pattering as the Pedophile computer completely pissed his pants. Beetlejuice’s eyes flickered down and noticed the clown’s bulge. 

“Pennywise, you…?” 

“Yeah. And you…” Pennywise asked. Beetlejuice nodded, and they shared a tender kiss. But suddenly… the car stopped. 

“Not again!” Lorax said sadly. “Where are we now?” Pennywise looked at his map. 

“We’re in a place called…South Park. I suppose we should get out and ask someone for help.”

“But my pants!” Squip cried. Pennywise and Beetlejuice ignored him, getting out of the car. 

“I’ll stay with you,” Lorax said. Beetlejuice and Penny got out of the car, walking down the snowy road looking for a sign of life. They shared a small smile as they viewed their options of people to ask— There was a man cooking outside, (They didn’t choose him, for they were scared of black people.) There was a blonde twink doing a line of meth off of another boy, and a ginger boy in chains who had a goldfish riding his dick. 

None of them seemed like viable options. They walked for another hour, but to no avail. Suddenly, Pennywise stopped in the road. 

“Beetlejuice… it doesn’t matter where I am. I love you!” 

Pennywise confessed. 

“I love you too,” Beetlejuice said, biting Penny’s fingernails lovingly.