To preface, I am specifically talking about skinny pale nerds with big glasses, button up shirts, khaki pants, plaid, ties, etc. I guess I would be referring to stereotypical nerds.

I love it when they don’t shower often. I think a nerd with a strong scent is much more attractive than a nerd who frequently showers. I like it when you can smell him through the pores of his clothes and he leaves a smell trail so that you can track where he’s been to and how long it’s been since he left that area.

Furthermore, I think nerds who are a bit whiffy are better at the art of thigh and butt strangulation. You may all know that there have been dozens of cases where stereotypical nerds have strangled people with their thighs and smothered people with their butts. Most of these were fatal – and I believe the odor emnating from an unwashed nerd is efficient in killing their victims quicker – think about it, if you were grabbed by a nerd and forced into a reverse figure four head scissor in the backseat of a stuffy, cramped car, and your face was shoved into his butt, can you imagine the smell? I think the victim must have eventually ***gave up*** trying to breathe because of the smell, which would have helped the nerd to kill his victim quicker. A person being strangled by a nerd’s thighs could be so overpowered by their stench that it distracts them from escaping from the nerd’s death grip. I’m imagining beads of super concentrated funk sweat dripping down the nerd’s ass cheeks and thighs.

In this respect, it just shows how clever nerds really are when they go weeks without showering.