Hey y’all, I just woke up in a cold sweat from what I thought was a bad dream. Obamer dun did it. He finally done did it. He took my god and my guns and he gave em’ to the queers. What kind of world do we live in where I can’t even leave the safety of my own home without fear of being gay married. This day, June 26, year of our lord 2015 will always be the day when America turned its back on Americans. Morally speaking this is our 9/11. This is what happens when y’all expose your children to this [shirtless men] instead of this [Hell] and Nascar. What’s next? Animals, children? I ain’t marrying my dog. What I did with my dogs that one time in the privacy of my own home is none of the state’s business. Y’all know who doesn’t do the whole scissoring and muffin smashing? Lady Liberty. Ain’t she beautiful? You ever wonder what’s under that pretty dress? Being gay is legal now. I’m moving to Canada with the snow beaners because America dun disappoint me for the last time. Obamer ya lizard man.