OP, I wish I had some kind of consolation for you, a few words to remind you that life is more-wondrous and fantastic than you think, that you don’t necessarily need to spend several hours of your time replying to other neckbeards’ incessant questions about a fantasy-life you’ve created for entertainment in a thread.
I wish I could tell you that there are worthier pursuits for somebody such as yourself.
I can’t, however.
I can’t, because you are a giant faggot of the highest calibre, who’s never had even the tip of your shrivelled, pathetic penis inside somebody of the opposite gender … or even your own gender.
You are unloved, you are unwanted, you are not respected and, worst of all, you are acutely-aware of this every single minute of your pathetic excuse for what you call a “life”.
You are not a sociopath. You have never manipulated or killed anybody. Hell, I’m willing to wager a few shekels that you can’t even manipulate the Down’s Syndrome child that barks furiously at you from next door.
You *can*, however, redeem yourself by taking steps to remove your sorry arse from this existence. It would be a small measure of redemption, but certainly one nonetheless.
>tl;dr: OP, you giant, deluded faggot, kill yourself