What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, handsome? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kisses. I am trained in french warfare and I’m the top kisser in the entire US kissing forces. You are nothing to me but just another cutie. I will make the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that good shit to me over the Internet? Think again, handsome. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, handsome. The storm that makes out with the handsome little thing you call your life. You’re fucking handsome, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kiss you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed gay, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Kissing Corps and I will use it to its full extent to kiss your handsome ass and the face of the continent, you little cutie. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking dick. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn handsome. I will french fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking handsome, kiddo.

No homo.