Big Dick Man: Ball-boy, this looks like the work of Scrotum Scutter!
Ball-boy: Gee willickers big dick man it sure looks that way, what with his victims having their scrotum’s shaved
Big Dick Man: Yes, that as well; Though I was mostly considering this note where he boasts about it. To the Dick-hole to plan our attack!
*bat-man style transition*
Cockputer, compute the following- Scrotum Scutter has returned. These are the coordinates of his latest non-consensual shavings. Compute possible base location
Cockputer: “Cockputing…. working”
Cockputer: “Scrotum Scutter base locations found.”
Big Dick Man: Excellent. Please print these locations. Ball Boy, looks like we have him
Cockputer: “Printer Error”
Big Dick Man: Oh leave it to a printer for a truly coke can sized cock-up
*Another bat-man transition*
Big-dick man: Now that we have his location on a hard-copy, Le’ts head out and confront him. To the Vas Daimlerens!
*Another bat-man transition, now they are entering Scrotum Scutter’s lair*
P.A System: Welcome, big dick man, and Ball boy, to my humble lair. I have been expecting you
Big-Dick man: That is because I’m polite and called ahead. I probably should stop doing that
P.A System: Yes. Perhaps. But my army of henchmen with shaved scrotums should take care of you
Big-dick man: Ball-boy, you know the plan
*Ball boy chucks a bottle of anti-itch cream, the henchmen all chase after it*
PA System: What? Impossible
Big-dick man: Scrotum scutter, you fool! You shaved these poor men 3 days ago, now the hair is regrowing and it’s as itchy as all fuck
PA System: Very well then, you leave me no choice!
*The floor starts to open up slowly, revealing a massive grate with small openings covering the floor as he starts to monologue*
PA System: I have thought long and hard about trying to find your weakness. And I think I’ve stumbled upon the solution. It was so simple- Infomercial drugs!
*A gas starts flowing out from the floor*
Big-dick man: Is this nerve gas?
PA System: No, not at all. However this gas is not for women who are pregnant or nursing and side effects may include headaches and erectile dysfunction
Ball-boy: Big dick man, you can’t breath it in, or you will lose your giant erection powers!
Big-dick man: Yes, Ward, I sussed that one out as well, he stated it rather plainly, I feel.
Big-dick man: That may be so, Scrotum Scutter, however, That’s not a guaranteed side effect, and I haven’t rubbed one out in a long time
*he pulls out his dick*
Scrotum Scutter: Go ahead! Try all you want! These infomercial drugs always make you useless in bed, I should know!
Big-dick man: Got some bad news, Scrotum Scutter. I’m starting to get an erection. You won’t like me when I get an erection.
*Suddenly, like a balloon being inflated, his dick inflated to a gargantuan size. Just in the nick of time, as the henchmen were just returning from the distraction*
Big-dick man : Ahh, just in time, boys *he spins around, knocking them all over with his gigantic dick* Now that I have caused grievous bodily harm with my dick, I’m about ready to finish this up…. *He spots a curtained area in a corner- classic…*
Scrotum Scutter: Well, it seems my plan has failed, but you’ll never find me.
Big-dick man: OH SHIT HERE IT COMES
Suddenly massive streams of semen started spurting like a fucking fire hydrant from big-dick-man’s huge dick which he had carefully pointed at the curtained area. The curtains were ripped off and Scrotum scutter was blasted for nearly a full minute with his full force, as he struggled to breathe and nearly drowned in big-dick-man’s special delivery
Scrotum Scutter: Ach! Once again I find myself drenched in your special sauce! My plan has totally failed, again! ^^^^^heheh ^^^^^guess ^^^^^he ^^^^^ate ^^^^^my ^^^^^pineapple ^^^^^basket ^^^^^love ^^^^^it
Big-dick-man: Call the police chief, Ball boy. we got him. Get a haz-mat team too. Best if this get’s cleaned up sooner rather than later, I know from experience.