Holy mother enticing god, you will not believe my unconvincing story this morning. I had a vivid dream where I was being harassed by 5 literal bitches under the grimy overpass. One of the *bitches* bit me in my large, sweaty, American meat. As soon as she did that, I woke up with a 7-inch underneath the blanket. I looked at my analog clock and it read 6:36 AM. I had never woken up so early in this time of early refreshing morning. I was thinking about going to church st this lovely morning to attend mass when suddenly the tip of my meaty cock twitches and throbs. I had made up my unhealthy mind to not attend mass and instead beat it. I am fully aware that missing mass and masturbating is a HUGE sin, but I cannot bear it anymore. So I go to the bathroom, step into the cold, but vibrant bathroom tiles and sit on the cold, closed toilet seat. I slowly pull down my undies and I think I saw what looks to be like **pre-cum,** so I begin by slowly putting my ample hand into my 7-inch throbbing cock and stroking it like what you do when you see a small cute golden retriever puppy, then I confidentiality stroke faster and rubbing my red-like-rudolph’s-nose colored tip of my cock. After what seemed like an eternity, loads of cum spurted out the peehole. I was amazed. First time masturbating and seeing and feeling what semen looked like. I then proceeded to get a portion of my cum, which smelt like chlorine, put it in my warm tongue, and swished it all aroun my mouth. It tasted like deviled eggs laced with sugar. I never expected it to taste like that because of the smell. I loved the pleasuring experience and will try it again soon. Thanks to that bitch in my dream.